A Wave Lies Prisoned
An abstracted composition of some limpets in a rock pool which was based around a beach in Devon I visited with my family on holiday. My children were spending time fascinated with all these little microcosms. Time seemed to stop as we spent it investigating each one on a freezing grey August afternoon in their summer holidays. It reminded me of my own experiences as a child when I would spend hours smelling flowers digging holes or making rose petal perfumes.
Later I found the poem titled The Rock Pools by Edward Shanks and it spoke to me.
Black Painting Series
I completed this series in Spring / Summer 2020. It represents the sadness and heartache experienced during lockdown. It is about wanting to go back in time when things felt happier, however I wasn’t happy then either because I knew what the future would hold, which was darkness. I would think about these memories with a romanticised nostalgia, and equally feel haunted by them.
Cells Self-Portrait series
The initial piece in this collection, entitled "Self Portrait (Grief)", was brought to life in 2017. Drawing inspiration from the cellular structure of ovaries, it was created as a response to a series of early miscarriages experienced by the artist. At the time of its conception, the artist's life was fraught with stress stemming from both work and a now-dissolved marriage. While deeply personal, this piece was not created until after the birth of the artist's two children, following a period of intense introspection.
Following this, "Self Portrait (Guilt)" was created. Conceived after the artist had relocated with their children, this piece captures a sense of profound self-loathing and hatred for the dissolution of their marriage. The artist felt judged by those around them and struggled with PTSD. Despite the toxic nature of the relationship they had left behind, the artist felt guilty for depriving their children of the stability provided by two parents.
Lastly, "Self Portrait (Order)" was created as a final visual reflection on this tumultuous period in the artist's life. By this point, the artist had determined that this chapter in their life was drawing to a close, and a new one was beginning. While each day remained a challenge, the passage of time had brought with it some relief. This piece marks the artist's move towards accepting the present and relinquishing their fixation on a projected future. It served as an end to the shame and scrutiny they had previously felt.
The stillness between
I grew up with my father interested in quantum physics, space and black holes. My mother always wanted to make the house beautiful, by obsessively cooking, cleaning and displaying fresh flowers. As a child, I would spend hours watching things, from birds and insects in the garden to fish displayed in the shopping centres. Now as a mother myself, I feel like I’ve experienced this time-travel cyclical loop. I’m repeating my parent’s interests which reminds and connects me to the memories of being small.
My work is about representing these family roles through the use of florals, animals and objects. Flowers in vases represent both my mother and myself, whilst they are painted surrounded by my children’s objects, symbolically replacing them, whilst also referencing being a child myself. There is a lovely haunting feeling of nostalgia when my children do something I used to and I’m trying to capture that essence.
My work is about representing these family roles through the use of florals, animals and objects. Flowers in vases represent both my mother and myself, whilst they are painted surrounded by my children’s objects, symbolically replacing them, whilst also referencing being a child myself. There is a lovely haunting feeling of nostalgia when my children do something I used to and I’m trying to capture that essence.
Water and Light drawing series
A4 and A3 original pieces depicting abstracted ripples relating to the interference of peace, childhood nostalgia and constant demand.
